How to Raise a Toxic Child

Today I ran across a list that had been sitting on my desk for a while, waiting to be shared. So with due credit to Mr. Bill Oliver, founder of the nationally known parenting series "Parent to Parent," I share this list.


The Top Ten Ways to Raise a Toxic Child into a Toxic Adult in the Toxic Society in Which We Live:


10) Be their BANKER. Just keep on giving them money without strings whenever they want it.
After all, "I want my kids to have all the things I never had. Their lifestyle should be much better than mine was without all of the work.


9) Be their INSURANCE COMPANY. Take care of all their mistakes and accidents for them. And
make sure to do all in your power to blame everything on "the other guy." After all, it's never my child's fault.


8) Be their AGENT. Don't ever let them know that they can't do EVERYTHING amazingly well! You wouldn't want to damage their fragile ego, you know.


7) Be their MECHANIC. If they break it, just fix it for them. After all, I'm sure they didn't mean
to.


6) Be their ADMINISTRATIVE ASSISTANT. Take care of their homework for them. Take their messages and deal with those messages so they won't have to.

5) Be their BUTLER. This teaches them that being lazy is okay because, after all, somebody else
will pick up after them and take total care of them. Plus, they're going to grow needing to learn how to manage their household staff.


4) Be their APOLOGIST. Make excuses for them - blame others. Let them know you're on their side in every argument.

3) Be their EMOTIONAL DOORMAT. You're an adult and can take it when they treat you like
scum off the bottom of their shoes. Take the blame and make sure they can speak to you in any manner they wish, even with no respect. After all, all their troubles are your fault anyway - you brought them into the world and owe them everything.


2) Be their FAIRY GODPARENT. Wave your wand and make it all happen. After all, their being
happy is your main reason for living.

1) FAIL TO TEACH THEM YOUR FAMILY BELIEF SYSTEM. Don't worry about the fact that the
only difference between Hitler and Mother Teresa is what they believed. And remember that in today's world there is no difference between "tolerance" and "everything is okay."


Raising a toxic child is easy. Just ignore their bad habits and ways. Clearly, turning that toxic child into a toxic adult is clearly just as easy. May God grant that the parents with better sense begin to take back the moral and work ethic training, and to rid our culture and our children of the toxic nature.

Kirk